2 Round 2010 NFL Mock Draft
ROUND 1 ROUND 2 ROUND 3 ROUND 4 ROUND 5 ROUND 6 ROUND 7
5/9/09
I’ve made a few minor changes to round one, and as always the new picks are easily identifiable in green. But the real kicker here is that I’ve added a second round. That, and the fact that the first round write-ups are absolutely hilarious. I mean, it’s almost like Charlie Chaplin is still alive and is watching me write while giving me silent notes. Feel free to let me know what you think, as always. DraftZoo@gmail.com
1. CLE — Sam Bradford, QB, Oklahoma
If Cleveland is picking first in 2010, then you know that Eric Mangini will have no opposition from the organization about finding “his guy” at quarterback. I think Bradford is overrated, and I wrote a lenghty article on that here, but that definitely won’t stop the new head man from stumping for him. He was literally panting over Mark Sanchez this year until he realized he couldn’t dump Brady Quinn or Derek Anderson. He’s just not that into them.
2. KC — Terrence Cody, DT, Alabama
Yeah, there are bigger needs on this team, but it’s a 2010 mock draft in May so what the hell. Cody is not worth the second pick, but then again Tyson Jackson wasn’t worth the third pick this year. Pioli doesn’t care. As long as someone whispers gently in his ear that “Cody is the next Vince Wilfork” then this will be the pick. Cody’s massive and can certainly become an effective NT in the 3-4 if he’s coached properly. But that might not happen in KC.
3. STL — Carlos Dunlap, DE, Florida
Steve Spagnuolo collects defensive lineman like I collect antebellum dresses, err, I mean baseball cards. That’s cooler, right? Yeah, baseball cards. Anyway, there is no way he’ll be able to pass on the most talented defensive end in the draft. His New York defenses were all about getting to the passer, and he’ll have a damn fine DE tandem in Chris Long and Dunlap for about 10 years if this is the pick.
4. TB — Gerald McCoy, DT, Oklahoma
Tampa Bay needs a premier defensive tackle. McCoy is the highest rated DT according to me. Of course, he’ll only be a junior this season, and he may go back to school, but I don’t see it. He could have been the top DT taken this year. He has the talent to become a force in the middle. Of course, if Josh Freeman pans out as well as I expect him to then they may go QB again. I mean Freeman is the first good passer they’ve had in forever, and it might just be too tempting an idea not to get another one.
5. DET — Russell Okung, OT, Oklahoma State
Yeah, I wish I could say I felt more confident in this pick, but it might only happen if Okung’s available in round seven. The Lions made it quite clear that they are not ready for the fans to forget about Joey Harrington by passing on about 1000 top OTs in the 2009 draft. What better way to honor Joey’s memory than to put Matt Stafford in constant situations that will have fans saying, “wow, I remember when Joey used to get hit like that.” Ahh, memories.
In all seriousness, Okung will be the top left tackle in the draft next year, and there is absolutely no way Detroit passes on the best body guard money can buy for their $78 million investment.
6. OAK — Taylor Mays, S, USC
Go get a pen and write this down: Oakland will draft Taylor Mays in 2010. It’s inevitable. Word on the street is that Al Davis is already working on some great “franchise-appropriate” puns. Stuff like “we Mays not suck anymore after this pick,” “Mays-be we will make the playoffs again one day,” and “I need more Mays-onnaise on this steak.” He’s vintage Davis. And you know Al is dying to have a poster of Mays and Heyward Bey on his bedroom wall.
7. BUF — Trent Williams, OT, Oklahoma
I have a feeling Buffalo is going to find out soon that Trent Edwards might struggle in the post-Jason Peters era. He won’t have any excuses anymore if he’s not sacked 11.5 times from the left side. The Bills will definitely need to spend a top pick here so that Edwards can legitimately blame everything on the O line. No one is expecting much from the current blockers, and if Trent doesn’t find a highly-rated scapegoat soon he may end up joining Dick Jauron after the season as one half of the coolest bartending duo Senor Frogs has ever seen. They’ll have to make money somehow.
8. CIN — Arrelious Benn, WR, Illinois
Maybe this isn’t a lock just yet, but Benn is only one allegation of grand theft auto away from becoming the Bengals’ top target in 2010. If he wants to play in Cincinnati, he’ll have to deviate from the straight and narrow pretty soon. And he’ll have to go hard. I mean it, no holding back. A simple misdemeanor like parking in a handicap spot won’t do the trick. You’ve got to want it bad. Bad enough to tear the tag off of a mattress or swallow your chewing gum. Something really despicable. That way the Bengals can get another target across from Chad Johnson, who may be gone by then anyway.
9. JAX — Trevard Lindley, CB, Kentucky
The Jags are in for a big surprise, but I’m willing to be the kind of guy who let’s the cat out of the bag, andI’ll ruin it for them right now. Here goes. Derek Cox was not the corner you were looking for in the 2009 draft. He’s not that good. So you might actually have to draft one in 2010. Lindley will be at the top of the cornerback class next year, and Jacksonville should be in a decent position to snag him. Of course, this means that they’ll probably draft seven CBs in a row.
10. SEA (from DEN) — Ciron Black, OT, LSU
I’m finding it hard to come up with a clever way to make fun of Seattle here. They got a great pick from Denver, and this trade will allow them to take a replacement for Walter Jones as well as another top talent. Black is a great player with loads of experience. He’ll be a top ten pick. Unless the Seahawks pull a Detroit and pass on him for fun. They could take a quarterback here to groom behind Matt Hassellbeck, and then cleverly forget to buy him any blockers. Nah, that’s dumb.
11. DAL — Eric Berry, S, Tennessee
Dallas managed to trade out of the first day in 2009, and then proceeded to use 10 of their 12 picks on average players. So maybe Jerry Jones wises up and takes one great player while forfeiting all of his other selections. I’m pretty sure he thinks that’s how the draft works. They need a safety in a bad way. Michael Hamlin may pan out, but there is no reason not to take Berry here. He’s an awesome talent. So maybe they won’t draft him.
12. WAS — Jevan Snead, QB, Ole Miss
Really any quarterback here will do. Daniel Snyder hates Jason Campbell. I mean he’s been a starter for like two seasons and he hasn’t won an MVP award or a Super Bowl yet. What nerve. Snead is another SEC guy with good upside and a name that kind of sounds like Snyder. Good enough for Dan. Congrats Jevan, you’ve got six games to win a title, cure cancer, and find an audience for Bo Bice. Good luck kid.
13. MIA — Ndamukong Suh, DT, Nebraska
I can just see Bill Parcells in the Dolphins’ war room.
“So who should we draft, Mr. Parcells?”
“Ndamukong Suh.”
“Ok, any reason?”
“Ndamukong Suh.”
“I’m not sure I understand, sir”
“Ndamukong Suh.”
“Okay, we’re getting nowhere with this. Let’s break for lunch at that Japanese place. What will you have sir?”
“Ndamukong Suh.”
“That actually makes sense.”
Seriously though, Miami could use some fresh faces on the D line, and Suh is a big, athletic guy who is a hard worker, which makes him a Parcells pick. It’s just that I can’t think of any reason to have drafted Vontae Davis over Darius Butler other than the fact that Vontae is more fun to say. And there’s no name more fun to say than Ndamukong Suh.
14. SF — Joe Haden, CB, Florida
Watch carefully next season. Mike Singletary will begin screaming like a Brit at the dentist about taking a kicker with his first pick a month before the draft. He’ll have everyone convinced that Bret Swenson (he’s a kicker from Michigan State) is all set to become a 49er. Then BAM! Out of nowhere he’ll take a great player who probably shoud have gone earlier. That formula worked well for San Fran this year. Everyone had that pick pegged as a pass rusher or offensive tackle, but Singletary and the Niners were smart enough to snatch the top talent on the board. They could definitely use an upgrade at the position, and unless a top safety falls to them, they’ll shore up the secondary from the outside in.
15. HOU — Jonathan Dwyer, RB, Georgia Tech
The Texans need a powerful complement to Steve Slaton. Dwyer will be one of the top backs in the draft next year, and he has the size and speed to be a perfect fit here. Still, I can’t figure out if they’ll reach again for someone like Brian Cushing. This team seems pretty set everywhere. I could see them going with a safety if Mays or Berry falls. I could also see them taking whoever looks the best in a speedo. So maybe they’ll draft me.
16. GB — Adam Ulatoski, OT, Texas
Green Bay usually does a decent job drafting great value that matches up with need. Ulatoski is a massive tackle who will definitely fill a need on the O line. I doubt Chad Clifton will be around after the 2009 season, and Ulatoski is looking like a good bet to come off the board in round one. I just hope they don’t get the Mr. Irrelevant guy to announce the pick. It took him like 20 minutes to figure out how to pronounce Succop.
17. NYJ — Dez Bryant, WR, Oklahoma State
The Jets have to take a receiver in round one next year. They have a pretty good line in front of Mark Sanchez, the defense is poised to have a huge year, and the running game should be strong. So what’s left? Pass-catchers. Now, I’m no dunce. I know that guys like Danny Devito, Papa Smurf, and Wee Man are more along the lines of what New York looks for in a receiver, but Bryant will be too good to pass up. They have to find a large target for Sanchez. Jerricho Cotchery and Chansi Stuckey just won’t do. Bryant has great body control, soft hands, and has been extremely productive in college.
18. DEN (from CHI) — Tim Tebow, QB, Florida
I’ll be the first to tell you that Tim Tebow will be a great NFL QB. And I’m actually being sincere here. Just read my Defense of Tim Tebow article. I know I’m in the minority on this, but I’m sticking by it. So why am I mocking a mobile passer with questioned accuracy to the Broncos? Mostly because he doesn’t really fit the system. After all of Josh McDaniels’ statements about getting system guys for his team, he went and took Robert Ayers in round one who fits in the 3-4 like Andy Dick in a lumberjack competition. So if we learned anything from McDaniels’ first draft, he’ll take an SEC guy he likes that makes many pundits scratch their head. Kyle Orton might make it for one season, and Tom Brandstater might look like Matt Cassell from afar, but neither is the long-term answer at QB.
19. TEN — Brandon Spikes, LB, Florida
The Titans will need some younger linebackers soon. McRath will never be more than a weakside starter so there’s room for an upgrade in the middle. After a flashy year full of wideouts, I figure Jeff Fisher will be safely returned to Earth from his annual trip to Neptune. I mean come on, where else would he get a sweet moustache like that? The God of the Sea has to be providing him with facial hair. So now that the picks will likely switch back to defensive side of the ball, Spikes makes sense as the best defensive player available. He’ll be an awesome pro, and it’s likely that his name is called long before the 19th pick.
20. SEA — CJ Spiller, RB, Clemson
The Seahawks are making the humor hard to come by. Spiller is overrated in my opinion, but he does have great speed, and he could be a nice change-of-pace back for Seattle. He catches the ball well, and he’s definitely a homerun threat. So maybe he can play for the Mariners in the offseason. They should probably start negotiating with Jim Mora Jr on that. No matter what, the Hawks have to start running the ball better.
21. MIN — Colt McCoy, QB, Texas
Hahaha, I know this pick won’t happen because drafting a QB is a big no-no for the Vikings, but it should. If Minnesota finishes even this well, there’s a chance that Brad Childress still has a job. And if he can survive in Minneapolis this long with no playoff wins despite an incredible defense and running game, then he can pretty much read the latest issue of US Weekly on the sidelines without fear of unemployment. Which makes it likely that he’ll have time to develop a guy like McCoy. Unfortunately, this will be a wasted pick since no one will ever beat out Tarvaris Jackson while Childress is around. Not even the awesome Sage Rosenfels.
22. PHI — Brandon Graham, DE, Michigan
This is pretty simple. Andy Reid loves to draft defensive linemen, and there is absolutely no way they ever help Donovan McNabb again after the offensive shopping spree we saw from Philly in the 2009 draft. I’m willing to bet they make him drive to all of the away games and sew his own footballs after doing him such a big favor this year. Probably won’t let him eat any Chunky soup either.
Previous pick: Everson Griffen, DE, USC
23. ARI — Kam Chancellor, S, Virginia Tech
I know I’m the only one who seems to think that Chancellor could play his way into round one this year. But I’m okay with that. Chancellor will probably stay at free safety this year, but he has the size and strength to be a great replacement for Adrian Wilson, who might not be around after 2009. He’ll be a big boost to the secondary, and like the guy I had in this spot last time, he can carry Kurt Warner off of the field so that the aging QB doesn’t have to get a permit to drive his Rascal onto the gridiron.
Previous pick: Bryan Bulaga, OT, Iowa
24. NO — Geno Atkins, DT, Georgia
The Saints are absolutely head over heels for Georgia defensive linemen. Hasn’t exactly worked out all that great for the so far, but hey, since when do the Saints learn from their mistakes. Outside of the 2009 draft, they’ve been content to ignore the secondary through the draft by signing overpriced and overrated free agents. Jason David is just plain bad, but that didn’t keep them from going after Randall Gay and Jabari Greer. The only way this pick doesn’t happen is if Atkins transfers. They need a stronger pass rush, and Atkins can get into the backfield.
25. SF (from CAR) — Sergio Kindle, LB, Texas
The Niners could use Kindle. He’s a former linebacker that will end up playing on the line as a senior, and no one coaches pass rushers like Will Muschamp. Kindle’s an athletic terror, and if he’s available here he’ll be the pick. But only because they can’t draft Muschamp. Can you imagine how much pep the San Fran sideline would have with Singletary and Muschamp on the staff?
26. ATL — Jermaine Gresham, TE, Oklahoma
Tony Gonzalez would be a perfect tutor for Gresham. He’s clearly the top tight end in the draft, and the Falcons have to know that Gonzalez won’t be around much longer. It’s got to be all about helping Matt Ryan. So logically the next move will be to get rid of that “Matty Ice: nickname. Nothing gives a franchise class like referring to your QB as a variation of the world’s cheapest beer.
27. BAL — Damian Williams, WR, USC
The Ravens had an awesome draft in 2009, but if there’s one hole to point out it’s that they failed to address the need at wideout. Williams has outstanding speed and has played in a pro-style offense at USC. But more importantly, he’s got great speed. If there is one thing the Ravens want out of their new receiver it will be the ability to speed. Joe Flacco wants a receiver who has speed. In fact, if there is one attribute Flacco seemed to be most looking for out of his next receiver this season it was speed. Good news is, Williams has top speed. His speed is really better than most of the receivers in this draft. You know, guys who don’t have great speed.
Previous pick: Marshawn Gilyard, WR, Cincinnati
28. SD — Anthony Davis, OT, Rutgers
San Diego seems to be a good bet to take the best right tackle available. Much like last year. So they probably will surprise us all and draft a position that seems like less of a need. Davis is a good fit here value-wise if he comes out. On a side note, I heard someone refer to Norv Turner as the worst coach in the NFL today. I don’t have a story about it, but I did find it ridiculous. There are a lot of coaches worse than Turner. Unless, of course, Turner’s been running around beating up Shawne Merriman, Antonio Gates, and Ladainian Tomlinson at the same time. That’s the only way I could see him being responsible for their injuries.
Previous pick: Arthur Jones, DL, Syracuse
29. PIT — Major Wright, S, Florida
The only remaining need for Pittsburgh that seems to carry any value here is upgrading the free safety spot. Jones is a tough safety with good range who can deliver crushing hits. And that’s what Pittsburgh needs. I mean when was the last time the Steelers had a hard-hitting safety who strikes fear into the hearts of NFL receivers? The answer is that they have Troy Polamalu and they have him now, but how cool would it be to see two kings of the deep ball beatdown patrolling the secondary for the same team?
Previous pick: Reshad Jones, S, Georgia
30. IND — Rolando McClain, LB, Alabama
There was an outside chance that the Colts were going to take James Laurinaitis in the 2009 draft, so obviously they feel that Gary Brackett won’t be in Indy after the upcoming season. McClain is a big backer who comes from a complex NFL defense coached by Nick Saban. He’ll be a great replacement for Brackett, and he might last an entire season now that Indy drafted two normal-sized defensive tackles. Good timing Rolando.
31. NE — Bryan Bulaga, OT, Iowa
The Patriots need offensive line help. That’s about as simple as it gets. I had LeGarrette Blount here, but he is likely a later round guy due to his lack of speed and almost strictly power running abilities. I’m upset though because now I can’t use the joke here that I did when Blount was the pick. Ahh hell I’ll do it anyway, Blount will eat Laurence Maroney and then the Pats running problems will be solved. Even if he’s not the pick. He’s a very hungry hippo.
Previous pick: LeGarrette Blount, RB, Oregon
32. NYG — Javier Arenas, CB, Alabama
The Giants will likely move Terrell Thomas to safety, and if they’re picking last, then they’ll definitely be in a position to simply add some competition to one of their few weak positions. Arenas is also a special teams star, who excels in the return game. He’s a little undersized, but the New York should go for irony here and take someone who makes people laugh when they see the word Giant on his jersey.
